Addiction is inherently a form of self-hatred and self-destruction. Self-destruction is defined as “behavior that causes serious harm to oneself”. Self-hatred is defined as “intense dislike of oneself”. There is simple logic behind addiction being a form of self-hatred. When we like ourselves, when we love ourselves, when we respect ourselves, when we believe we are worth liking, loving, and respecting ourselves- we continue to do so. We do not hurt ourselves, harm ourselves, or hurt others. Our unconscious is no longer riddled with the toxic amount of self-loathing and self-destruction that leads us toward automated behaviors that hurt us and other people. Having developed a relationship with ourselves based on love and acceptance, we are not willing or able to tolerate anything less. Recovery is the end of active addiction, which helps us actively recover beyond quitting drugs and alcohol. The more we recover, the more we learn to love ourselves. The more we love ourselves, the less we hate ourselves. As we hate ourselves less, we are less likely to hurt ourselves through self-destructive means like drugs and alcohol.
Guilt and shame are mixed into the experience of living with addiction like a well made ice cream. The separate parts are part of the ice cream, findable in almost every bite. Everything in life of mind, body, and spirit becomes underwritten with guilt and and shame. Addicts and alcoholics hate their addiction, no matter how they may demonstrate the contrary. Every drink, every dose of drugs, every missed event, every time they let down their loved ones, every time they let down themselves- it hurts. No matter how deeply it hurts, they are willing to continue the actions and behaviors which cause that pain- over and over again. Guilt and shame are not part of the human experience. Guilt and shame have to be learned. Recovery is as much a process of learning as it is unlearning. We have to learn how to live without guilt and shame by unlearning how to live with guilt and shame. By learning about where our guilt and shame comes from, we can unlearn the guilty and shameful beliefs we hold about ourselves. As a result, we unlearn self-hatred and instead learn to love ourselves.
Treatment and recovery will change your life. When you change your life, your change your legacy. Infinity Malibu is helping people start a legacy of recovery in their lives with luxury residential treatment programs and a full continuum of care. Start your legacy today by calling us for information on our programs for substance use and co-occurring disorders: (855) 575-2604