Who Can I Trust?

We can’t trust what we don’t know, so it’s a good idea to take time to get to know someone before we jump to trust. Of course life doesn’t always give us time to do our homework and research someone’s credentials and track record. For example, we could be in a hospital emergency room and need immediate surgery.

Terrible things can result from trusting the wrong person. We can jump into a roadside purchase only to discover the guy was a crook and ripped us off. We can trust a coworker only to be manhandled in the stairwell. We can’t see manipulative behavior ahead of time because the perpetrator is adept at hiding it. People like this can be sociopaths, psychopaths and priests. Studies have shown these scary personality types can be very intelligent and charming.

When it comes to dating, followed by what we call a new relationship, we must be exceedingly careful. If we’ve lived alone for a long time, we may jump from the first date, to bed, and into the moving van the following week. Likewise the person we are dating may also want to move too fast. By taking our time and going slowly, we can better see the signposts and red flags of what could be a bad relationship. It’s wise to protect ourselves and not be too quick to trust.

Studies have shown we make snap judgements about people according to their facial expressions. One study concluded facial expressions don’t necessarily have anything to do with a person’s trustworthiness. However, we can’t always go with what’s black and white.

Who we trust, whether in the moment or a length of time, can depend upon the connection we have with our intuition. We can decide to trust our intuition whether we have an instant positive or negative reaction to someone we meet. Intuition can be defined as instant knowing. Intuition is instinctive. Not everyone believes in and trusts their intuition. They play it down or ignore thoughts that come to mind ahead of an endeavor.

Take for example, a woman who had a bad feeling about the trip she’d planned. Everything went haywire before departure day. She couldn’t find her passport, her dog sitter reneged on his obligation, and she got a bad cold. The signs not to go were adequate signs but she went anyway. The plane made an emergency landing and she was badly hurt. We need to learn to trust ourselves before we can trust someone else.

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